EC Cooper

When you don’t tell your friends it happened because you’re ashamed of what you did and how you reacted to it, and you rationalize that it was something you did that made him shy away. That it was because you slept with him too soon. Because you didn’t play hard to get. You didn’t follow the rules and you failed to act like a hooker who just shrugs and moves on to the next conquest, like those are the only two things a girl can do.
You blame your own fundamental attractiveness, figuring that somewhere in between him pursuing you and his losing interest, you did something that made him stop liking you. You called him too soon or too much. You made a dumb joke. You texted him too late after he texted you, and then he didn’t respond. Maybe he hated your taste in the books he saw on your shelf. Maybe he cringed when you used that emoticon in your last e-mail. Or maybe somehow, he caught wind of your secret - that you were actually unloveable. Needy, ugly, fat, desperate, whatever it is you’re afraid of guys finding out you are or you think you are - even if it’s just a person who has the balls to remain ardently committed to the act of falling in love.

Julie Klausner - I Don’t Care About Your Band: What I Learned From Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I’ve Dated
(via bethanyymaee)

I wish I had this book 10 years ago.  It would have saved me a lot of time and grief.


But when you’re young, and you’re habitually dating the damaged, and they don’t come through, you have to make the conscious choice to separate the columns in your head that say “This is who I am” and “This is how I am being treated.” And then you have to figure out how to let go of somebody who’s gone, not because you’re pacified in the realization that you’re not liked, but because you figure out that maybe you’re the one who doesn’t like him. Not just how he acts, but who he is. And then you have to decide if you want to keep going out with guys you don’t think are great, or if you like yourself enough to hang out for a while on your own.

Julie Klausner

I Don’t Care About Your Band

(via colonelkernal)


A single girl dating a married man is begging to be dragged by her hair back into the cave. Because while no man deserves a harem, all of them think they deserve more than one woman to slake their multicompartmentalized male brains. Just because men are able to separate “this one takes care of my children” from “this one does this thing with her bare feet on my taint” it doesn’t make it OK for them to multitask once they’ve committed to being faithful in front of friends and family and an expensive cake.

Julie Klausner

I Don’t Care About Your Band

(via colonelkernal)


Follow what it is that you love and makes you want to be better, always. But don’t get yourself tied up with any kind of rock star—musician or not—who makes you feel like you are not made of star stuff. Because of course you are. Give me a break.

— Julie Klausner, I Don’t Care About Your Band (via runlololorun)